If I tell you the Boy and my sister fondly give me the nickname of 'Monica', perhaps that will give you an insight into certain aspects of my personality... I like order, control, clean lines and minimalism. Chaos confuses me and spontaneity can be difficult - although not impossible - for me.
I spent all of yesterday undertaking a Spring clean of the flat, a job I know some people dread and find mundane and arduous. But I loved every moment of it! Throwing out bags and bags of rubbish and recycling is therapeutic for me. There is something about clearing our home of unnecessary 'things' that purges my soul and refreshes me. I feel lighter for having less 'stuff' and take a real satisfaction and pride in the fact that everything that remains in the flat looks neat and tidy, and is in its proper place.
My friends laugh gently at my desire to have all my bookshelves organised by genre, my CDs in alphabetical order, and my wardrobe organised by colour - but all these things give my life a sense of structure and make me smile. For how my home looks and feels is incredibly important to me and my state of mind. When the flat is clean and ordered I feel happier inside, and I feel confident that I can be creative and achieve my goals. When the flat is cluttered and disorganised, I feel unstable and anxious.
Regular readers of this blog will be aware that anxiety can be an issue for me. In recent times it has been my default state, and - while I feel it is becoming less of an issue as I understand more about how my thoughts and feelings work - my propensity to worry and become tense is something I must be mindful of. Taking the time to create a home that I find happy and secure and that I am proud of is really important. It alleviates unnecessary strain and helps me be content in the here and now - my mission for the year!
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